What’s so bad about being Doubting Thomas? He is criticized for not having the right kind of faith when the ten remaining apostles reported that they had seen the Lord. But doubting is not incompatible with faith. If you think about it, the opposite of faith is not doubt but certainty. The 9/11 hi-jackers had certitude but they didn’t have faith. To have faith is not the same as knowledge but a hand outstretched and ready to be clasped, a melody lingering expecting a song, a bud in a vase waiting to blossom. If the opposite of faith is certainty, the opposite of doubt is apathy, indifference, a lack of curiosity. Thomas was seeking the “substance of things hoped for” which is the very definition of faith according to the Letter to the Hebrews. He deserves kudos, not condemnation. What is most striking about Doubting Thomas is the evidence that he seeks in order to come to faith – we wants to see, he wants to touch the wounds of Jesus. You would think that the evidence for faith would be more miracles – water to wine, loaves multiplied, storms calmed, a sea or even a pond walked upon. But Thomas had seen all that and it didn’t bring him to kind of faith he knew he needed. So he sought to touch the wounds. The only way he could trust that the Easter news was truly good was if it connected with who he was, with what we all are, wounded persons.
Thomas mentions the physical wounds of Jesus – the mark of the nails in his hands and the puncture wound in his side. But he could probably had in the back of his mind the wounds he had endured which needed to be touched. If Jesus’ wounded body could be raised up there was good reason to hope that Thomas’ wounded soul could also be made new. The Bible doesn’t tell us too much about Thomas but we know from our own story what it is like to have a wounded soul. We can suppose that his wounds are like ours. Thomas was a twin which probably produced a feeling that he was never quite good enough, that mom always like his brother more. Thomas possessed, like us, a background sense that there was something wrong with him, that he didn’t measure up. He was afraid to stand out because if he did there was a good chance he would be attacked. And he probably had guilt feelings because he wanted something more – why always Peter, James and John? Why not him? His wounded soul made him yearn to experience the good news that God can deal with wounds — but he had lived with his pain for so long he had his doubts.
There is something remarkable about the scene which isn’t obvious at first. Thomas presumed that the Risen Jesus would still bear his wounds. He had seen blind men regain their sight at the word of Jesus. He had seen the lepers cleansed by Jesus. He had witnessed Lazarus coming forth from the tomb, for Pete’s sake. Despite his awareness of Jesus power to heal he did not imagine that the wounds of the cross, the wounds of the passion would be healed. He expected even the Risen Jesus would be wounded. There is something profound about that insight. Thomas knew that certain wounds cannot be healed, but if Easter was true, if Resurrection was possible, then Thomas could believe that all wounds, even the deepest and most painful can be transcended, can be overcome, can be remade into a source of life instead of pain. If Jesus were truly Risen from the dead then the wounds don’t get the last word – life does.
When the Risen Jesus does come to Thomas and the other disciples he comes as he always does – bringing peace. “Peace be with you,” is the first word that the Jesus addressed to the eleven when he appeared in their midst. He says it three times to make sure they get the message. Jesus wants Thomas, wants the apostles, wants us, to know that peace, genuine peace, peace that surpasses understanding, is possible even though one is a wounded person. Touch my wounds, Thomas, Jesus says. They are real wounds that testify to great harm was done to me. But Easter life means that nothing that has happened to us – even the worst of things – prevents us from living full of peace and joy.
Which brings us to this Sunday… Besides the wounds given and taken over our lifetimes we have the added stress of social distancing and staying at home orders today. We turn to the Scriptures, we turn to Jesus today and ask for the peace he bestowed so freely as the Risen Lord. Give us the peace of knowing that you are at work and that we can do all things through him who strengthens us. Give us peace that even our wounded selves can have life and have it to the full through the gift of grace. Give us the blessed assurance that whether we’re the young and the restless or the bold and the beautiful, as the world turns in the days of our lives, even if we end up in General Hospital that we have one life to live and God’s guiding light will give us peace through it all. That is the blessing promised us who have not seen but yet have believed. That is the doubting but resolute faith that makes us blurt out with Thomas, “My Lord and My God.”
